Welcome to Journey To The Centre Of Ajax Mine!
Sitting in Vancouver International Airport, I watched on a big screen a promotional video of Kamloops showing all its great attributes.
I wondered how the video would look when the proposed Ajax copper and gold mine becomes a reality and moves into the city limits.
I wondered how Venture Kamloops may have to promote Kamloops’ newest addition to the community:
“Visitors! Welcome to Journey To The Centre Of Ajax Mine!
“While visiting Kamloops and all it has to offer, don’t miss this exciting tour. It’s conveniently located within city limits and is only 15 minutes from city centre.
“Here’s your directions to the Ajax mine: Take a drive through the quiet residential area of Aberdeen Hills and, while you’re there, make sure to shop for luxury homes with prices discounted by up to 50 per cent. When you come to a nice little school called Pacific Way elementary, it’s just another 90 seconds down the road to the giant Ajax mine!
“Don’t be alarmed by the face masks the children are wearing on the schoolgrounds; the dust and other contaminants may only affect those who live close to the mine for prolonged periods of time, but nobody knows for sure.
“Just past the local school, you arrive at majestic Ajax mine! The dark cloud surrounding the mine and the constantly changing temperature gives Ajax an ominous look and feel.
“Kind of an end-of-the0world feeling, but it adds to the mystique of the Tournament Capital of Canada.
“Once you arrive, make sure you tour Ajax’s Museum of the Past and learn of the ancient land dwellers called ranchers and farmers, who raised their livestock on these once-beautiful rolling grasslands.
“And, stop by the gift shop for a heaping jar full of tailings jam and some yummy mineral-strone soup.
“Of course, there are health benefits to touring the mine as well. The massaging tingling feeling in your body feels wonderful because, as long as the blasting occurs and the machinery keeps on digging, you’ll always feel a gentle vibration all over your body — 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
“Oh, and keep your eyes open for film crews who love to shoot on the churned-up earth tailings as it realistically looks like a lifeless planet.
“But, nothing will impress you as much as the mighty Ajax hole, so big, so deep and so grand that it seems to go on forever!
“It’s big enough to be seen from outer space and it just keeps getting bigger! No one is really sure how big it will get!
“So, don’t miss Journey To The Centre Of Ajax Mine!
“Book your tour today. Don’t forget to tell your friends about Kamloops and the biggest hole you’ve ever seen.
“It’s the new catchphrase!”
A humorous tale(ings) or not?
The proposed Ajax mine will be too close to our excellent city.
It should not be allowed.